Caps' Media Day - Completely Fabricated Edition

Today is Media Day down at Kettler Capitals Iceplex. I was not issued an invitation, which is not surprising after I let it slip to a Caps official that my only real motivation for attending would have been to get close enough to Dave Steckel to enact my sweet revenge. But I'm dedicated to bringing you the in depth coverage you can't get anywhere else, so I wasn't about to let a little thing like a direct order from team management not to show up get in the way of bringing you a hard hitting story. So I did some investigating, and eventually, I was able to get Dave Steckel on the phone for a hard-hitting, in-depth interview, the transcript of which follows:

KHFC: So, Dave, please explain to my readers, in as much detail as possible, why you are trying to kill me?

DS: Who is this?

KHFC: Very funny. Seriously though, what's the deal with that?

DS: How did you get this number?

KHFC: Given your precarious position on the Caps' depth chart, shouldn't you really be more focused on trying to kill, say, Brooks Laich?

DS: Why would I try to kill Brooksie?

KHFC: Why would you try to kill me, you psycho?!

DS: ... (hangs up)

So, there you have it folks. Dave Steckel: a man who clearly wants to off his own teammates to ensure himself a spot on the opening night roster.

Rookie Camp - Day 4: Scrimmage Edition

Today's rookie camp practice consisted entirely of a scrimmage. Because I know you're dying to know, here's your (probably innacurate and definitely incomplete) boxscore (question marks denote instances where I missed what happened because I was focused on something other than the play):

White Team
Francois Bouchard - Nicklas Backstrom - Dan Kronick
Maxime Lacroix - Travis Morin - Steve Pinizzotto
Steve Werner - Jay Beagle - Marty Guerin
Karl Alzner - Josh Godfrey
Sami Lepisto - Sean Collins
Daren Machesney

Blue Team
Mathieu Perreault - Justin Taylor - Brett Leffler
Andrew Gordon - Kyle Wilson - Luke Lynes
Tommy Maxwell - Andrew Joudrey - Donald Brashear
Sasha Pokulok - Jamie Hunt
Tyler Sloan - Patrick McNeill

Goals
1st Period:
WHITE - Pinizzotto (Morin, Lacroix)

2nd Period:
BLUE - Brashear (Pokulok) (PPG)
BLUE - McNeill (?)
BLUE - Lynes (Gordon)

3rd Period:
WHITE - Bouchard (Unassisted)
BLUE - Taylor (Hunt, Pokulok)
WHITE - Morin (Pinizzotto, Kronick)
BLUE - Maxwell (Hunt, Pokulok) (PPG)

Penalties
1st Period:
BLUE - Pokulok - 2 minutes for ?

2nd Period:
WHITE - Guerin - 2 minutes for hooking
BLUE - Maxwell - 2 minutes for holding
WHITE - Collins - 2 minutes for hooking
BLUE - Maxwell - 2 minutes for holding
BLUE - Maxwell - 2 minutes for holding


3rd Period:
WHITE - Beagle - 2 minutes for elbowing
WHITE - Collins - 2 minutes for ?

FINAL SCORE - BLUE 5, WHITE 3

The third period was, by far, the most entertaining. Bouchard's goal was especially pretty, picking up a loose puck along the left boards then curling and dragging towards the net. Also of note were successive tic-tac-toe passing plays on both Taylor's and Morin's goals. All in all, it was fun to finally see something resembling an actual competitive hockey game for the first time in five months. Not as exciting as it will be tomorrow, when I have a team to actually root against, but still, it was one more indication that the long, slow march towards October 5 is nearing it's conclusion.

After the rookies were finished, the veterans once again had an informal skate. My suspicions that Dave Steckel has designs on my life were confirmed when he made absolutely no attempt whatsoever to kill me.

My mortal enemy

Apparently, Steckel thinks he can trick me by lulling me into a false sense of security. But I'm onto you, Dave. Your ruse failed. Even after you tried switching uniforms to disguise yourself.

Dave Steckel in disguise

Tomorrow's game between the Caps' rookies and those of the Flyers is way out in Vorhees, NJ, seemingly far from Steckel's clutches. But I am not so foolish. Take heed, Dave. I'll be watching you, and if you try anything funny, I will make you regret it.

Rookie Camp - Day 3: Pretty Colors Edition

In case you were wondering whether I have anything better to do during my vacation than travel out to Ballston to attend Day 3 of the Caps' rookie camp, the answer, obviously, is no. I made the trek out there once again today and once again I was treated to, well, a bunch of young hockey players skating around (I swear it's not as exciting as it sounds). This time around, it was even more difficult to get a read on whether any particular players were really sticking around as, unlike Saturday, nobody had their names on their backs. They were nice enough, however, to color code themselves, which didn't actually help, but was at least a little more interesting visually. Which gave me something to do, as I tried to obtain photographic evidence of all seven colors. Ultimately, I missed only the burgundy duds:

Orange

Black

Green

Grey

Red and White

If I had to pick one player who particularly impressed me, I'd go with Andrew Joudrey, who had an impressive moment towards the end of practice when, during an offensive zone drill, he took the puck from the bottom of the left circle, curled around three other players to the top of the slot and then sent a backhand shot over Daren Machesney's outstretched leg and into the net.

The more interesting part of the day, though, was watching the guys from the big club skate after the rookies were done. Specifically, it was fun to watch Olie Kolzig. Having never really attended a Caps practice before, I've only ever heard the well-spoken, made-for-TV Olie, so it was a little bit odd to hear him in practice sounding, well, more like a sailor than a hockey player. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Towards the end of the team skate, as the guys were having a somewhat loose scrimmage that had less defense than a typical NHL All Star Game, Olie, after getting scored on for maybe the third or fourth time, started into a profanity-laced tirade. His complaint (and I'm paraphrasing here, attempting to translate it into a more family-friendly version) was that the scrimmage was basically a waste of time as a result of guys not taking it seriously. He urged his teammates to "pick up the... pace".

The amazing thing was the seemingly instant change in the atmosphere. What had been a light-hearted game of shinny suddenly turned into a hard-fought battle. As hard-fought as an informal pre-training camp skate can be, anyway. It is one thing to hear the players talk about how much of a team leader Olie Kolzig is, and another to see them play at a higher level when he is on the ice as opposed to Brent Johnson of Frederic Cassivi. But it is another thing altogether to witness it in person. It was a moment that made me appreciate Olie's presence on the team that much more.

On a more light-hearted note, I am convinced that David Steckel is trying to kill me. It wasn't enough that he "accidentally" fired a puck directly towards my head (thank goodness for plexiglass), he then had the audacity to flip a puck up over the netting that hit me in the shin. Not only that, but he managed to do it at a moment when I was looking away from the ice, leaving me with absolutely no proof whatsoever that he was the one who shot it. He who laughs last, laughs loudest though, and my revenge is, as always, swift and severe. Dave Steckel, congratulations, you are the newest KHFC Whipping Boy©.

The grisly results of Dave Steckel's viscious attempt on my life.